It's high school kid Taniela Tupous 18th birthday and the 300lb Tongan decides to celebrate by smashing local rivals Kelston Boys and score a hattrick of tries. He then forces his school - or it might be the opposing one - to sing him happy birthday and then probably steals all their lunches.
In a match against Kelston Boys' High School first XV, "Turbo Tupou" or "the Tongan Hulk" from Auckland's Sacred Heart College scored a hat-trick, including two tries run in from over 50-metres.
When I was at school we used to play Sacred Heart, it wasn't pretty. We lost both games home and away but had a massive brawl because they tried to intimidate us because we were really tiny and they were massive like this guy. We caught their dirty NZ rep prop at the bottom of a ruck and rucked the f*ck out of him- our backs even piled in, in a fantastic show of solidarity.
Their parents ended up coming on the field to pull us apart and we had a go at them too and the game was called off. Good result, got no retaliation. Got to love schoolboy rugby - lawless. Not as bad as Church College. Bigger than the All Blacks, they broke 3 necks and killed someone one year.