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Report: Absolutely awful human being discovers the only wrong way to eat a waffle

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There are foods that can be eaten any time of day. Eggs, feta cheese, Peanut Butter Captain Crunch...

And waffles.

I dare you to throw a dart at a board with all 24 hours in a day and tell me a waffle doesn’t taste great then. Noon? Sure. 3am? Absofuckinglutely. Dinnertime? Let’s go.

But if there’s no wrong time to eat a waffle, is there a wrong way? I didn’t think so until I saw @HousefromDC absolutely blaspheme the timeline by putting butter on a waffle after he had poured the syrup.

Call the damn police. I mean what the hell, dude?

I can’t stop thinking about how wrong this is. You put the butter on first so it can touch the warm waffle and subsequently melt. Then the syrup. Woke Waffle Dude is gonna tell us that scissors beats rock in his next Ringer video and the moral arc of the universe is going to come crashing down.

POLL TIME! Which goes first — butter or syrup?

Poll

Which goes first on a waffle?

This poll is closed

  • 89%
    Butter
    (701 votes)
  • 10%
    Syrup
    (84 votes)
785 votes total Vote Now