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2019 NFL schedule release: Our probably dumb but maybe not dumb Jaguars win-loss predictions

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NFL: Jacksonville Jaguars at Tampa Bay Buccaneers Jonathan Dyer-USA TODAY Sports

The Jacksonville Jaguars 2019 regular season schedule has just been released and you know what that means?

WAY TOO EARLY WIN LOSS PREDICTIONS!

Here are our predictions for how a season with a quarterback who plays better than a potato and a defense that may be even better will play out:

Week 1: vs. Kansas City Chiefs

Win. As Alfie Crow pointed out earlier today, the first six weeks of the Jaguars’ schedule is rough. I don’t think they come out of it with more than a 3-3 record, but I think this is a game they can (and will) steal. Having a Super Bowl favorite coming to town early in the season before teams really have film on Nick Foles in this offensive scheme will give Jacksonville an advantage.

Record: 1-0

Week 2: @ Houston Texans

Loss. I don’t think we win a single game next season on the road against a mobile quarterback. Not a single one. The Texans have our number on the road and that’s not going to change with an offense that I don’t think will be able to keep up.

Record: 1-1

Week 3: vs. Tennessee Titans

Loss. Until we can beat them, we can’t — especially on a short week. Prove me wrong, Jaguars.

Record: 1-2

Week 4: @ Denver Broncos

Win. You’ve got a long time to prepare against a less-than-mobile quarterback. The advantage of playing in Denver will be tough and a 4:25pm kickoff is less than idea, but I think Jacksonville gets it done.

Record: 2-2

Week 5: @ Carolina Panthers

Loss. This defense will have no answer for Cam Newton and Christian McCaffery so early in the season.

Record: 2-3

Week 6: vs. New Orleans Saints

Loss. Drew Brees was one of the least sacked, least pressured quarterbacks in the NFL last year. I don’t think our defense or offense match up well against them.

Record: 2-4

Week 7: @ Cincinnati Bengals

Win. The Bengals are a bit of a mess right now and I think the Jaguars take advantage.

Record: 3-4

Week 8: vs. New York Jets

Win. Sam Darnold won’t be as bad as he was last season in Jacksonville, but this is another matchup that’s favorable to the home team.

Record: 4-4

Week 9: vs. Houston Texans (in London)

Win. The Texans have never been to London and I think the more experienced Jaguars will win across the pond.

Record: 5-4

Week 10: BYE WEEK

Week 11: @ Indianapolis Colts

Loss. That Colts offensive line is only getting better and Andrew Luck did better than I thought he would last year. I think this is a game they get out-schemed and out-gunned, much like their last trip to Indianapolis.

Record: 5-5

Week 12: @ Tennessee Titans

Loss. Ugh.

Record: 5-6

Week 13: vs. Tampa Bay Buccaneers

Win. A turnover-happy quarterback coming to town? Sign me up.

Record: 6-6

Week 14: vs. Los Angeles Chargers

Win. The Chargers will be in the middle of a playoff run but a cross-country trip to face a Jaguars team still in the thick of it and the wheels still on will be tough.

Record: 7-6

Week 15: @ Oakland Raiders

Loss. It’s the final NFL game in Oakland and the league picked the Jaguars to play it... and for good reason. East Coast teams playing on the West Coast are at a significant disadvantage and I think this is a comfortable win for the Raiders.

Record: 7-7

Week 16: @ Atlanta Falcons

Loss. The wheels have come off after a bad loss across the country and they’re on the road against a good Falcons team.

Record: 7-8

Week 17: vs. Indianapolis Colts

Loss. The Colts will be competing for a division title and the Jaguars will be playing for pride — and we know how that typically works out.

Record: 7-9

What do you think? Are we too pessimistic? Is another Titans sweep too cynical? Let us know in the comments below!