THE HORNY INDEX: Which TV broadcaster has been more horny for Gardner Minshew?

Jacksonville Jaguars quarterback Gardner Minshew is good. Very good. So good in fact that his play on the field causes certain... emotions upon viewing.

So far this season, we have had multiple TV broadcasters comment on Minshew in a way that ranges from a Freudian slip to full blown horned up.

Without further ado, I give you THE HORNY INDEX.

Troy Aikman

2 out of 5 roars

“Well, Minshew, they got him listed as 6’1” — that’s probably about where he is, 6’ or 6’1”. I tell ya, he’s... he’s packed. I guess he leg presses 500 pounds and if you saw him you would not be surprised. I was shocked how thick he was.”

I’m not going to lie to you, we’re getting into steamed up territory. But Aikman isn’t really horny in this moment, at least not consciously. He stammers a bit and his emphasis on the word “shocked” followed by a thoughtful pause and ending with the thick hammer moves the needle for me.

Acceptable, but noteworthy.

James Lofton

4 out of 5 roars

Andrew Catalon

5 out of 5 roars

Andrew Catalon:

“Since joining Jacksonville in 2017, he is now 46 out of 49 kicking field goals. What an acquisition this guy has been. And if Lambo is getting free meals down in Jacksonville, what is Gardner getting down there?”

James Lofton:

“Here’s a guy that brought in off the street and he’s been a success story down there. Probably gets a lot of free meals around town.”

Andrew Catalon:

“Well if he’s getting free meals, what is Minshew getting down there?”

James Lofton:

“We know what he’s getting, he’s young. We know what he’s getting down there.”

We are in HORNED UP territory, folks. I have to give Catalon the full five roars because he initiated the entendre. Lofton just sort of goes with it. But make no mistake — these guys are talking about some s-e-x.

Shameful.

Honorable Mention: THIS GUY

5 out of 5 roars